The power of narratives 

A narrative is a field, and dreams are seeds we must plant in the right narrative field to reap the fruit we hope to enjoy during our time on earth. From birth to death, we live within stories—some inherited, some imposed, some self-created—and these stories shape the conditions under which our dreams grow… or die.

Just as plants need the right environment to thrive, our dreams need the right psychic soil—a mental and emotional terrain— that is nurturing rather than toxic. When someone exists inside a narrative that does not resonate with who they truly are—that dissonance can lead to depression, alienation, or numbness. Much like strawberries won’t flourish in soils that are too wet or too hot, our dreams cannot grow in every field. It is essential to understand the psychic fields that are toxic to our dreams, and the psychic fields that can nurture our dreams. If we plant in the wrong soil, nothing will grow. Likewise, when we function in a narrative that does not align with our true identity, our dreams cannot bloom. Instead, they shrivel and die, starved of the right mental and emotional nourishment. Sometimes, we even defer these dreams, convincing ourselves that “one day,” when we have enough resources or time, we will return to them. 

But what is the cost of a deferred dream?

How do our suppressed dreams eventually explode in our faces? How do they burst through poor choices, destructive coping mechanisms, and addictions that hinder us? How does the misery of a misaligned life seep into our souls, poisoning us in ways we may not recognize? In other words—how do we explode?

The wrong narratives kill dreams

Let’s take the example of an artist who dreams of being a singer because (unbeknownst to them) they come from a lineage of griots and vocalists. In a modern context however, they may not know how to nurture this dream or this ancestral gift within them because they have been conditioned to believe that pursuing financial security means they must ignore or suppress their creative gifts. As a result, they would probably disregard their dream by rationalizing their choices with excuses like, “I must choose a stable profession to be worthy,” “art is impractical,” or “real success means a steady paycheck, even if it slowly kills my soul.”

Sadly, every day we wake up, we live in repressive paradigms that suffocate our dreams, shaped by imperial legacies that define success through productivity and profit; thus marginalizing dreams that do not align with these expected production outputs. Such dominant social narratives force a painful choice between survival and passion, productivity and purpose. We know that sacrificing our true callings for money leads to depression. Yet we do it daily, because we do not know how to change the matrix we live in, nor do we know how to re-imagine alternative storylines where human potential is celebrated and given space to bloom instead of being controlled and constrained by extractive ideologies.

Identifying the Dominant Narrative

If we want to live healthier lives, we must therefore question the narratives we have internalized from a very young age. We must rethink and reexamine the stories we were exposed to, and the stories that were hidden from us; the stories that were glorified, and the stories that were demonized; for it is in understanding the stories that fuel indoctrination that we can begin deconstructing and reconstructing narratives that better align with our wellbeing, instead of continuing to pledge allegiance to narratives that do not serve us (i.e. narratives that celebrate overworking oneself to the detriment of personal wellbeing, narratives that celebrate war and violence as a normal part of life, narratives that encourage complacency, narratives that paint the production of unhealthy, cancerous foods as progress, etc.)

We live under the weight of countless unconscious scripts and paradigms that limit our vision of ourselves and our place in the world. That’s why narrative coaching invites us to externalize the stories we live and breathe in every day, by recognizing the dominant cultural or familial narratives that shape us—often without our awareness. 

Reclaiming the Counter-Narrative

If we use the example of the artist who comes from a lineage of griots, we can say that they carry a powerful ancestral story within them that is asking to be re-embodied in the present. However, in order to extract the individual’s life force, the dominant narrative silences that story. (And once the matrix has used up all the individual’s energy and time, it throws them into a retirement home because they are no longer useful to the imperial machine). But it’s not all doom and gloom. The first step to changing a narrative, is becoming aware of the narratives that oppress you. Once you can clearly deconstruct these toxic narratives, you can start working on finding and reclaiming the many counter-narratives that have always existed in parallel to the narratives you grew up in, but that were pushed to the side and marginalized so you could be mined and mind-controlled.

Deconstructing and reconstructing narratives 

Thankfully, narrative coaching can help you unearth these buried counter-narratives, rooted in compassion, ancestral gifts, and communal joy. Healing begins when these silenced stories are given space to breathe again.

Here are some questions to help you start your narrative work right now. I encourage you to write your answers down, as you may be surprised by what emerges. 

1. What poisonous stories have you internalized, that are now seeping into your life and killing you softly ?
2. In whose (hi)stories are you living—yours or someone else’s? If so, whose? 
3. Is your present aligned with a future you chose, or one that was chosen for you?
4. What dreams have died inside you because of the narratives you have internalized about yourself and the world? (And what are those narratives?)
5. How does your current story reflect your personal past and your ancestral past? 
6. How does your current story reflect a future you did not choose but that has been chosen for you? (i.e. who decided what you should aspire to have or who you should aspire to be in life? Who told you what you should consider as successful, what ambitions you should or shouldn’t have, what dreams you should entertain and what dreams you should abandon? Who has defined your future for you, and set you on a path you are not even aware of? What external structures and influences have led you down a road you may not want to be on anymore?) 

You may not know where to start, but if you really want to rewrite your story, know that you can begin exactly where you are. In fact, you can only start from where you are, and go from there. Step by step. It’s time to honour the sacredness of your dreams and to reawaken the sacred stories that have gone dormant within you. It’s time to choose the right psychic field in which you can thrive. It’s time to rewrite the story you were conditioned to live. It’s time to make space for the dreams that never stopped calling your name. 

What Narrative Coaching Offers: 

1. Awareness of the stories you have internalized
2. Space to mourn the dreams that have died
3. Permission to rewrite your story—on your terms
4. Freedom to plant your dreams in the right soil where they can grow

So book an appointment, and let’s get to work.